50 things

Reading from Wednesday, November 25, 2015 yoga class

In my last post on "Tears" little did I know that I would have the experience of where my tears flowed so soon.  My friend and our fellow student, Ann Wineland, passed away today.  She was a grand lady who wrote the best emails and notes ever.  I will miss seeing her walk into the studio; I will miss seeing her walking at the park; I will miss our emails;  I will miss the notecards I would receive in the mail from her;  I will miss the newspaper articles she found on yoga or trees that she would always give me or mail with a note; I will miss having lunch with her;   I will miss her dearly. My tears were flowing from the outer corners of my eyes.

Now to the reading I did for today:

From an article entitled "Living Gratitude" by Kim Childs

Take time each night to write down 50 things for which I was grateful.  50 things???  Yup, she said 50 because it's not really about the list.

In order to create a lengthy gratitude list every night, you have to spend your days looking for things to write down.  So far today, my items would include finding my favorite tea on sale at Whole Foods, that delightful toddler in the checkout line, an email with just the right words, and the wonderful breeze that called me outside for a walk.

Sometimes the things that make my list reflect what did not happen that day, like a near miss on the highway, the car repair that wasn't needed after all, and the medical test that came back negative.  When I turn on the tap water, I'm grateful that I don't live in a town plagued by drought or contamination.  When my wheelchair bound neighbor calls me for help, I'm reminded to appreciate my legs.  And, because Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh once said something like "be grateful for the non-toothache," I often give thanks when pain or illness has disappeared.

It's easy to be miserable when I'm suffering.  I need to be thankful when I'm well. Sooooo... what's up with the gratitude list is to flip our internal script from a running monologue of criticism and complaining to one of appreciation and wonder for what we have and what is always available.

Still, I'm imperfectly human, and there are times when it's hard to trust that life is giving me what I need when it's not giving me what I want.  Benedictine Brother David Steindl-Rast, who writes extensively about gratitude, says that it begins with a sense of surprise for all that is given, rather than an air of entitlement. I also make it a habit to voice my appreciation to others whenever possible, from my husband's helpfulness in the kitchen to a store clerk's cheerful assistance and funky earrings. And who knows?  I just might be giving them something to add to their own list that night.